Friday, January 29, 2010

Five Ways to Get Back at Your Ex That Will Also Help You to Get Your Ex Back

Many personal relationships are based on fragile bonds that couples must strengthen and maintain if their connection is to remain healthy and flourish. Unfortunately, couples do break up, and unhappy separations can cause stress, remorse and frustration.

After suffering through a broken relationship, it is natural that you would be extremely upset and consider ways to get back at your ex. But, really, is this the best step you can take to ultimately get your ex back and the best attitude to hold inside?

The most effective steps you can take to get back at your ex will not only put your former partner in an interesting quandary, but they will also move you toward repairing your relationship. It will show your ex how important you are and were to them.

These five key steps will not only enable you to get back at your ex, they'll also help you to get your ex back.

• Remain strong. No one wants a needy, desperate person hanging on -- particularly during a broken relationship. Do not beg, cling or come across like a distressed individual. Your ex should see you as someone who has moved on and is doing fine and remaining strong without them. Move on and make your ex realize they have not.

• Close off communication. Ending communication or cutting it down to the minimum may not seem the best tactic, especially when your real desire is to rekindle your relationship. However, it is a vital step when getting back at your ex and getting your ex back. Step away from your ex and minimize communication. Let your former partner swing in the wind for a bit without any contact from you. This isolation will enable your ex to see how important your relationship was to you both.

• Remain flexible. Refrain from making demands or pressuring your ex in any way. Don't set a date when they must move out or collect their belongings. Listen, sympathize and remain accommodating. Seeing this tolerant, receptive side of you will surprise your ex. The goal is to encourage them to strengthen lines of communication that didn't exist when you broke up.

• Get out and go out. You shouldn't be alone. Link up with friends and get busy. Rebuild or create a social life that includes a good amount of enjoyment and entertainment. You needn't date or even begin associating with the opposite sex. But you must mix it up and enjoy time with your friends. Getting out will serve as your therapy. Plus it will help to show your ex how much of a good relationship and a good person they've lost.

• Be yourself. You and your ex once had a very good reason to get together and form a loving relationship in the first place. Your goal should be to get back to being yourself. Give your ex a reason and a means to remember why they originally loved you and what they saw in you. By renewing your self image, you'll strengthen the positive perception others have of you. And this renewed, affirmative self image will reflect positively into your ex's eyes as well.


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